Kid things

I am allergic to pollen and get sick every year in spring. The itching watery eyes and running nose with the occasional heaviness in the head makes me miserable. I avoid the freeways and usually take the inner roads to the office at these times. Today was one such day. I was on my way to office and reached a traffic stop at a busy intersection. My eyes were watery and flowing. I pulled a tissue to wipe my eyes dry as I waited at the stop sign. I put my glasses again and noticed that I was behind a school bus. The bus was full I believe, I could see some movement behind the windows. There were 2-3 kids at the rear waving at me.  It took like a minute for me to realize that they were actually picking on me. I think they had seen me wipe my tears and they too were trying to rub their eyes with their hands waving at me. I could not stop smiling looking at what they were doing. They seemed to enjoy teasing me as I candidly followed them until the school bus took a turn into a neighborhood. I just could not stop smiling even after I was miles away from where the bus had turned. Kids are amazing! 

I cannot imagine a day without my daughter. One of us, if not both, me and my wife, has to be always behind our daughter. Watching where she goes, what she pulls; pretty much we have to constantly keep an eye. I had left my personal laptop on the dining table the other day. My daughter cannot still reach the dining table but she did something I had not imagined. She got up on a chair and then climbed on the dining table. Once on the top she had pushed the laptop down. From then on we are extra careful with the things we leave around in the house. I am amazed at the way she can get to things. She somehow comes up with surprising solutions to get what she wants. 

But I think we adults are sometimes even more amazing. 

If the kids do something new, it’s like an achievement for the parents. After they do it a couple of times, it becomes an expectation from them. This happened 3 or 4 months back. We were getting ready to go out for dinner. Once she was all dressed, my daughter got her shoes from the rack and she put them on herself. We were surprised. She was only one and half year old but she had chosen the correct shoes and had even put them on, on her own. We just could not stop praising her. I even called my parents in India to tell them how talented my daughter is! For the next few days we would curiously watch her as she would select her shoes and put them. Once we got over our initial surprise it became an expectation from her that she will put on her shoes herself when we are going out. She was just a year and half and whether kids of her age do it, we started expecting her to do. Similar to the appraisals that happen at work. The first time you do something amazing it’s "Beyond expectation". The next time you do the same, it’s "as expected" and if you continue doing the same it will be "below expectation'.

My daughter still does not speak much but a few days back she called me by my name. We were very happy with the way she spelt my name and made her say it again and again. She started calling my wife too by her name. It sounded good initially but soon she struck to it. From then on in front of our daughter I address my wife as mama and my wife addresses me as papa. Our daughter now calls us papa and mama. I think my wife and I have to address each other as papa and mama at least for some more time. I am sure 10-15 years from today when we recall all this or if my daughter happens to read this, we will all have a good laugh.

~Narendra V Joshi

Isn’t thoughtful austerity what we really need?

“Austerity” was recently named the word of the year. With every major world economy still deep in the recession, taking unaccustomed and previously unthought-of steps to contain the impact of the recession on their economy, this comes as no surprise. A search on the net for the word austerity pulls up pages and pages of government measures aimed at cutting cost. And this is not limited to any one country or region but spread across the globe. This too is a no surprise considering the fact that this recession is slowly turning into a pandemic in its own way.

But what surprised me were measures taken by some countries to cut the extravagance. I read of measures such as cutting back aid to existing schools and stopping funds for new schools, layoff of law enforcement and medical personnel, and deferring budgets related to enhancing public transport infrastructure, which in my opinion is unthoughtful. Schools, law enforcement officials and public transport are the back bone of any civilized society and if there is cut in spending on these, I am wondering, what are these governments even trying to achieve in the long term? A system affected by scoliosis? Also, some of the measures suggested were like blanket measures meaning they will extend for some more years. I am no expert in these matters, but my opinion is to come up with measures which are much more thoughtful and scientific.

A question crossed my mind as I read, is austerity really the solution? I think extravagance in a way, is one of the reasons for many of the advancements we are enjoying today. Thanks to the early adapters willing to pay the premium, products meant for the rich become available for the common man. Advancements in F1 cars trickle into passenger cars giving the common man technologically advanced yet affordable cars to drive. Air travel, which a few decades back was considered a luxury, is available for everybody today. I think most of the items around our houses were once meant for the rich folks who were ready to buy paying a premium for the technology which has now become affordable. If not for those who demand a better facility than what is already available, and who are willing to pay for something extra, those extras will never become affordable. Maybe in a way extravagance is required to make our lives easier and smarter. So I think instead of focusing on a blanket cost cutting exercise, we need to think of alternate ways to achieve efficiency and growth.

On a different note, this is the first time I am using the word austerity so many times. Also I think till a year or two years back, I had not used this word at all (wondering if I even knew the meaning of the word austerity 2-3 years back!!). Thanks to the recession, I got to know how to use the word austerity. As they say, bad times show new doors!!

~Narendra V Joshi

Nature

Wading through the Zig-Zag Road
Caught a glimpse of her green Robe;
Held by the landscape, with a glossy knot
Her dress is beautiful was my first thought.

Like the water gushing down the hills
Her silky hairs which the wind blew in swirls;
As the sun from between the leaves showing bright
Her sparkling ear rings were a treat for my sight

Like the golden brown sands of the beach
Her chubby cheeks looked like apples and peach;
Star fish eyes and full lips like wine
Inviting me to make her mine

She, is just like love
Know only to the beating heart;
Beautiful, omnipresent yet strikingly absent
Except from preying eyes or a poets heart


~Narendra V Joshi

Behind the darkness

He was afraid of the dark. We all are. It’s not the darkness we are afraid of; rather it’s the thought of what lurks behind that darkness which scares, even though we know nothing scary really exists. He knew that, but the dark screen gave him an eerie feeling. He had been working non-stop for the last 18 hours. The fatigue showed as he dragged his heavy eyes across the laptop computer screen. He had developed a program and was now doing an integration testing of the modules. All the complex modules had worked correct but the first simplest program he was testing was failing.

Computers are an interesting creation. He always liked comparing the computer and the human brain. If the human brain is considered the pinnacle of God’s creation, then the computer is a pinnacle of the human creation. They can never go wrong. An automobile with a computer at its heart can go wrong but not the computer itself. The parts which make up a computer can go wrong but not the computer itself. But still the computer was just a terminal. It could do nothing on its own. It needed a program to run it. It was the program in it that made it look intelligent. Without the program it is nothing more than a light bulb.

“Check the code; review the database queries” the words of his friend echoed in his mind. He liked history and zoology but had got into computers by chance. It was through his friends he had learnt the programming languages and was where he was today. But again, today was different. The simplest module which added 2 numbers was giving incorrect results. It was as if the computer was trying to play a game. He decided to run the tests one last time before digging into the code. He pressed 1 as the first input and 2 as the second. The screen displayed “Result = 4” much to his dismay. He pressed 2 as first input and again 2 as second input. The display was “Result = 4”. It seemed to trick him. He pressed 5 as the first input and 7 as the second. The screen displayed “Result = 4”. He was unable to understand. Maybe the computer was alive. Maybe it was trying to con him. Maybe the screen was about to explode in his face. The very thought of the screen exploding in his face sent a chill down his spine. He dismissed the thought and tried to focus on the problem. The test results didn’t seem to help. There was some problem and the only way was to get into the code. He glanced at his watch and it showed 2:46 AM. He was trying hard to keep his eyes open and focus on the problem. He decided to quickly scan the logic and clicked the open source code button. The screen suddenly went complete black. He did not understand what had happened. He clicked some buttons but nothing happened. He tried to restart his computer but nothing seemed to respond. It now became clear. The computer was alive and really playing a trick on him. Something strongly told him to get away from his computer before it exploded in his face. He immediately got off the chair and moved away from the computer. The dark screen seemed to have started the countdown for the explosion and there was nothing he could do to stop it. He dashed into his bedroom. The cool air in the bedroom eased him a bit. He put his head on the pillow and that was the last thing he remembered.

Daylight was pouring through the window as he slowly opened his eyes. The faint hiss of the cool air flowing through the AC vents was the only sound. He lay on the bed and began to think of the previous night. He was trying to solve the problem when the computer had suddenly gone blank. He got out of the bed and walked into the living room to his computer. The open laptop computer lay there unexploded. In the daylight the computer appeared nothing more than a dumb machine. The battery had died and the power cable was off the socket. He fixed the power cable and started the computer. He opened the source code and scanned down to the “Add” logic. The first 2 lines were to read the first and the second input respectively. The third line was “Print Result = 4”.

“The computer can never go wrong” the words of his friend echoed in his mind.

~Narendra V Joshi

Memories

Through my window I see them moving

Like people at a party tattling and talking

Though amidst friends haven’t heard them speak

For an occasional rustle or a soughing squeak

There ought to be a reason strong

Or something got to be very wrong

Like a dark secret you keep to yourselves

These trees might have something to keep to themselves

Or they may be just like me in this far off place

Missing my home and the familiar face

Those sweet memories leave me craving long

To return to my place which is pulling so strong

~Narendra V Joshi

A toast to those by-lane trees

Never in my recent memory have I been so much amazed, and lost, looking at plants and trees as I was today. The lush greenery of the by-lane was a wholesome treat. The last time I had walked on that same lane was in February. It was a cold day and every tree gave an eerie graveyard feeling. The scene today was different, and mesmerizing.                                                                                                                                                               

{I hated the subject Botany when in college [Mathematics being the most hated!] History and zoology are my all time favorites!!}
                                                                                                                                                   

The lines below are dedicated to those by-lane trees which aroused a sense of appreciation and curiosity in me-

The flowers had gone and the dried leaves set to fall
The once majestic tree now stood empty and tall
Those were the snowy short winter days
When the trees had nothing to hide the sun’s rays;

The leaves sprang as the day grew
Colorful flowers were soon in full view
With arms, now stands the tree daring the sultry days
Providing shade by blocking the sun’s rays;

I wonder who makes the trees play the sun’s rays
Warmth or shade to provide enough for the needy days
With no answers I owe it all to that miracle hand
Delicately fitting the things in the way they should stand

~Narendra V Joshi

The gen X celebrities

There is an old saying in Marathi which goes – a student should get the better of his teacher and a son, of his father. Going by the real time trends aired on one of those “real” TV shows, this saying has truly become old. Behold all you teachers and fathers out there, the generation X celebrities have arrived to compete, and in style. (On an entirely different note, I always thought news IS the REAL TV, until I came across one of those locked in a house shows).

The headlines is the marriage of the protagonist of a reality show, who chose his bride from among a whooping (hold your breath) 16,000+ contestants. Forget the teachers and the fathers; this is like even giving the Lord, a run for his popularity. For the benefit of those who are cut off from these “real” world shows (I too have arrived late, enriched my knowledge of these shows only today!), the celebrity protagonist in these shows chooses his/her bride/bridegroom from among thousands of suitors and the entire event from interview till marriage is aired on the TV. To all my bachelor and bachelorette friends who are desperately seeking out, here is your answer; become a celebrity and you are married overnight! I am still thinking of the real meaning of a celebrity though. Movie stars, Drug addicts, politicians, sports persons are all celebrities. The 60 year old who hits the gym to bash up 15 goons and romance a 25 year old is a celebrity, and so is the 25 year old who hit’s the gym to turn into size zero. You just have to think of a way to become a celebrity and then get into a reality TV show. It’s a gold class ticket to stardom thereafter!! Another advantage of being a celebrity or act in a reality TV show is the awards that follow. Anybody who is somebody is awarded these days. Awards which our previous generations could only dream of are given away like store coupons. Going through the profile of the awardees will many a times makes you wonder if they were even worth a nomination. These are the same awards which our previous generations could never make it to or even if they received, it would have been decades after they died. The current generation seems to have an upper hand here and is setting a new bench mark for the next. They are receiving the awards while still young and importantly when many of them don’t even know why they received it. Discovery and innovation is the key. If you are a celebrities’ son or daughter, you just need to be discovered and if you are not a celebrities’ son or daughter, you have to invent a way to become a celebrity.

Talking of discoveries and inventions I wonder how our deserving scientists and researchers feel when they see awards being given to these reality show celebrities. Nobody anyway seems to bother how star fishes navigate on the ocean floor, or about the huge black hole in a far away galaxy. Our scientists and researchers are rarely featured in the newspapers and their existence in the movies and TV shows so far has been mostly limited to one of those weird looking, long haired, absent minded characters. Maybe they should start thinking of ways to become an overnight celebrity. Something like developing a pill which will make a male always smell like cologne, or a lady to never ever bother wearing lipstick as her lip color changes to suit her dress.

By the way, did I mention? If 74 Kg for a male becomes the new “Weight Zero”, even I am a celebrity!!!


~Narendra V Joshi