Lesson from the backyard tree

The majestic tree stood steadfast in the yard;

A magnet for life, it struck an instant cord. 

With birds and squirrels, in its bounteous shade;

Into which the afternoon sun would dimly fade.

The shield of invincibility soon started to unveil;

The cold winds of fall stripped it to a leafy trail.

The tree which once stood against lightning and storm;

Was wilting in the cold air; losing its form.

The voracious growth and the annual leaf purge combine;

For the tree hides a secret, a profound design.

Behind every visible success and the silent toil;

Lies an invisible purge, where hard lessons coil.

~Narendra V Joshi

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I watch the tree in my backyard change with the seasons. In summer, it stands tall and full of strength. When autumn comes, it lets go of its leaves one by one, and by winter it is bare. Then spring arrives, and the tree returns even stronger, bursting with fresh growth.

This cycle is a lesson for us. Like the tree, we must let go of ego and old habits, unlearn what no longer serves us, and relearn new skills. Each time we do, we come back stronger, renewed, and ready to grow beyond where we were before.

GenAI for Work, Homework, and the Parenting Dilemma in the AI Age

I was stepping out after dropping my kids off at their class when I heard someone call my name. I turned around and saw two friends waving at me. It had been a while since I had last met them. We huddled together and exchanged pleasantries. We talked about the different classes our kids take and discussed our work lives. Our conversation then shifted to Generative AI and ChatGPT, and each of us expressed our amazement at ChatGPT. One of my friends mentioned that his eldest child had been using ChatGPT to complete school assignments. He was unhappy that the child relied on ChatGPT for everything and wasn’t thinking critically. His concern was that children are becoming lazy with GenAI and might lose their cognitive abilities by becoming overly dependent on ChatGPT. After a while, we said our goodbyes, and I started back home, still thinking about that conversation. My friend's statement about kids' dependence on ChatGPT kept echoing in my mind.

Should we allow kids to use ChatGPT at all?

Now, this is a tricky question. In my opinion, there is really no right or wrong answer, and I have points to support and counter both sides.

• First, my thoughts on why kids shouldn’t be allowed to use ChatGPT: My friend is right—ChatGPT can make kids lazy. This is the age when they need to learn and grow, developing their cognitive and intellectual abilities. They should acquire skills like time management, researching answers, discerning right from wrong, and applying their knowledge to achieve desired results. All of this comes through effort and focus. If kids rely on ChatGPT for instant answers, they might only learn to copy and paste. Is that what we want for them? What will kids with copy-paste skills do in life? You can’t copy-paste food into your stomach, nor can you live in a copy-paste house.

• But then, why shouldn’t kids use ChatGPT, especially if they are using it to supplement their other knowledge sources? Let’s look back at our high school and college days. Those were the days when computers were gaining prominence, and there was a lot of talk about how we, as kids, were becoming lazy because we depended on computers for everything. The so-called guardians of society called us out for losing our ability to write with a pen since we were more accustomed to typing on a keyboard. We were also blamed for dwindling library attendance because we could search for answers on the internet. Yet, for the most part, we turned out fine. Yes, we may not write as much as our forefathers did, but hey—I rarely use a pen except for signing a document or a check once every few months or years.

 

If you decide to allow kids to use ChatGPT, where do you draw the line? 

I think this is the question that parents should ask. I do not think it is wise as a parent to not allow my kids to use ChatGPT, because learning ChatGPT is also a skill. Who knows maybe there will AI engineers and AI engineering is a top job in the future; just like how we took up computers and software engineering is one of the top jobs now. But it is also important for us parents to ensure our kids are not overly dependent on ChatGPT. ChatGPT cannot be the first and only source of their information. It should be their last source of information and should be used more as a validation of their understanding, knowing very well that LLM’s too can make mistakes.

All this begs the most obvious question. What is that one career track that can survive ChatGPT?

Honestly, I have no idea which jobs are truly safe from AI. Tech magazines and sci-fi movies proclaim AI and robots will eventually replace every well-paying job we have today. According to experts, the only jobs considered safe are those requiring social and interpersonal skills—like caregivers.

So, where does that leave all the kids in school today? I have no clue.

On a lighter note, if there's one job I think AI won’t take over anytime soon, it's that of a temple priest. Temple priests have already proven themselves to be both COVID-proof and recession-proof. From what I know, they are well-paid and have a steady income. Sun or rain, we go to the temple. Whether life is smooth sailing or we’re going through a rough patch, we still go. And let’s be honest—no matter how advanced AI gets, our minds are not trained to bow and fall at a robots feet or accept prasadam from one.

So, if you're looking for an AI-resistant, recession-proof, and well-paying career, temple priesthood might just be the way to go!

~Narendra V Joshi

Beneath the Waves: A Journey to Calm

We went scuba diving during the recent winter break. The underwater experience was incredible. Despite swimming since I was a kid, deep sea diving was a completely unique experience. It felt like an entirely different world. The sharp contrast between the churning waves above and the serene calm below was a powerful metaphor for me. At first, every problem seems daunting and nearly impossible, like those waves. But when you confront each issue directly, you find a peaceful resolution, much like the ocean's depths. 

Put these thoughts into a poem - 

=========================================================================

The boat rocked hard as it cut through the water;
The rough sea hammered in an endless slaughter.
The nice breeze felt cold under the wet suit skin;
Only the anxious eyes screamed of the storm within.

The dive took me to a calm surreal world;
Where silence reigned, the bountiful landscape whirled.
The fishes and the lobsters only added to the gleam;
A realm of mystery within an eternal dream.

The waves and the depths are a metaphor of life.
The rocking waves akin the life's daily strife.
Diving head on into the tranquil depths we find;
Serene waters mirroring a calm clear mind.

~Narendra V Joshi

Only the memories

 To my father... 

I have come to accept, the fact you are gone.
Yet your presence in my heart, stays warm and strong.
In the stillness of my mind, when I feel you near;
I close my eyes and wipe a tear.

I see your smile, I hear your voice,

And those little moments make my heart rejoice.
Though you're no longer with me in sight,
Your memory shines in me, like a beacon in the night.

 I know you're watching from above,

And sending me your endless love.
With me every moment, with me every day,
Deep in my heart, you'll always stay.

~Narendra V Joshi

Where I think we should go from here

I was at a transit airport waiting for my connecting flight the other day. I could see the airport tarmac from the waiting area. The waiting area was crowded as it was almost time to board. The incoming flight had arrived and was waiting on the tarmac to come to our gate. There was something going on at our designated gate and so they had stopped the incoming flight from arriving at the gate. The flight was on the tarmac waiting for an open gate for almost like 15-20 mins.

I noticed the gentleman seated next to me staring at his watch often, and shake his head in despise. He would utter something beneath his breath and clearly looked irritated.

He turned to me pointing to the airplane outside the window and asked, “Do you know how much fuel a plane consumes just standing there on the tarmac?”. I knew it must be something big but had no idea and so shook my head for a ‘No’.  I thought he will say some gallons/minute but all he said was “it’s a loooot of fuel”. “It’s just a waste, you know”. I nodded my head for a ‘Yes’. It was indeed a lot of fuel waste for a large plane to sit and wait.

He continued. “We humans don’t deserve this planet”. “We cut trees, burn fossil fuels and are destroying our environment”. “Animals are going extinct at an astonishing rate”. I joined in and we spoke about how the environment is getting affected. At one point he said “the best thing for this planet is to have all humans go back to forests and live like how stone age people lived. Only then earth has a chance to survive”.

I knew I did not agree with that sentence but before I could say anything there was a gate change announcement. We stopped our conversation right there and we both walked separate ways to the new gate. I did not see him after that.

I came back home that night with his words still baking at the back of my mind.

Should humans go back to living in forests and caves to protect the earth?

Before we answer this question, we must first look at the conditions in which the cave men lived thousands of years back. Cave men lived in caves; in forests; midst nature. Yes, it feels good and maybe even inviting to see those beautiful pictures and videos of nature and animals on TV. The reality however is far from it. Those colorful birds in the videos are not singing a duet. They are on a hunt to tear open an insect and eat it while the insect is still struggling. That insect was not waiting for the bird but rather searching for a worm to bite in into pieces or swallow the worm whole. Nothing out there is rosy. There is a big game of survival being played all the time and this applied to the cave men too. Living in forests and caves is not an easy thing. There is no coffee when you wake up in the morning, no hot biriyani for lunch nor that plush mattress and pillow to sleep on in the night. There are no doctors on call nor police to protect you. The cave men lived in constant fear of wild animals, struggled under weather, died due to diseases as they did not have a cure. Life was tough for humans back then. It was for this reason cave men got together and formed civilizations. They realized different people in the group could create/build/grow different things and sharing helped everyone. This idea helped formed villages and cities and countries we now live in.

So, do we need to leave all this advancement and go back to living in caves? I don’t think so.

If not, then what about that gentleman’s words? If we do not want to go back to living in caves, then how can we protect our earth?

I think the answer to this question lies in understanding where we live and how we can make where we live a better place. We have become so dependent on fossil fuels and plastic; I don’t think we can suddenly stop using them completely. Maybe we should start by making small changes in our daily life. Let’s buy things only when we really need; not because there is a discount. Let’s eat only when we are hungry, and more importantly let’s finish the food on the plate every time and not throw anything. If we can avoid driving and walk instead, let’s try doing that. A quick read about recycling tells a completely different story of what is happening to the products we toss into a recycle bin. Very little, if not negligible, is getting recycled. What we put into recycling too is ending up in landfills. So, see if you can reuse, but the best is to avoid buying in the first place.

I think where we need to go from here is not back to forests and caves. Rather, where we need to go from here is doing our part a little bit; consciously; habitually, to make this earth we live in, a better place.

~Narendra V Joshi

Conflicts in the mind

The houses and trees were covered by a blanket of snow.
The ice beads in the sun made for a glittering show.
Inches of snow had covered everything in sight;
Except for the sky and the sun shining bright.
 
The blanket shrunk as the sun came up.
Draining the sleet from like a broken cup.
The awe and wonder were all but gone;
Laid bare a pickled and a battered lawn.
 
The sun and snow mimic conflicts in the mind
The snow alike the ego and of the malice kind.
Knowledge and humility can erase a burgeoning pride;
Just like the sun shrinking blankets on its ride.

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We had almost 5 inches of snow yesterday. It was a beautiful sight this morning with everything covered by a blanket of snow. The snow started to melt by the afternoon. I drew parallels between how the rising sun melted the snow, to how humility and humbleness in mind can melt ego and pride.    

~Narendra V Joshi

Addition of patience

My younger one is in the virtual school this year. For his classes he sits in the living room where my wife can keep an eye and help him if he needs something. We time our lunch during his afternoon school break so that the family can have lunch together. Today however I was occupied at work and by the time I went to eat, the break was over, and my son’s school had already started. I could hear my son’s teacher as they went on with their regular school schedule.

Having seen my elder one through those years and now seeing my younger one every day, I know teaching small kids is not easy. If you are lucky, they will sit and listen to everything you say. If you are not, they can ask complicated questions or relate something you are saying to something unrelated and take the conversation in a tangential direction. A classroom full of kids can be a different story altogether.

This is how some parts of the class conversation went –

(The teacher was teaching math addition and was explaining how numbers can be added to each other to get a bigger number)

Student 1: Teacher, I want to tell you something.

Teacher: Yes, sweetie; what is it?

Student 1: The grass in our lawn has been growing taller and taller. They are adding up like these numbers.

Teacher: Yes, that happens sweetie. Did you have any question on what we discussed?

 

Another kid raised his hand to catch the attention of the teacher.

Teacher: Yes Student 2. Do you need something honey?

Student 2: Teacher, I want to use the rest room.

Teacher: Sure honey, but please be quick. I don’t want you to miss the lesson

Student 2: But I am not going to pee. I am going for something else.

Teacher: ok, but please try to be quick.

Student 2: I cannot be quick. I will need some time.

Teacher: Sure honey…

 

Every now and then one of the kids would say something unrelated to the math class and the teacher had to sweet talk the kids focus back to the class. I wondered what I would have done if I was a kindergarten/elementary school teacher. Would I have run away the first day?

As I thought, I felt, maybe most of us are like that schoolteacher in some way. We too face incomprehensible questions and ridiculous requirements from our team members, managers and customers at work. Yet we always answer with courtesy and treat work situations with upmost dignity. 

As my thoughts flowed, it suddenly struck me; I realized there was a problem. We treat random people at work, on streets, in restaurants, in movie halls; whom we may never even see in our life again, with courtesy and patience; but forget to apply that same courtesy and patience to our own family members without whom there is little meaning to our lives. We often seem to take our family for granted. We patiently spend hours repeating the same answer to our customers and office colleagues but snap the minute a family member repeats the question.

It took a while for me to finish the last few spoons. I was shaken, but I knew it was time for me to learn from this addition lesson and add a few things to my life. I have to put an effort to bring all that courtesy and patience I use in my work life, to home. The methodology is all there, and time tested. If my kids ask the same question repeatedly, I need to answer them as how I would answer an office colleague or a customer who is asking the same question repeatedly. Such an easy thing; yet it needed me to listen through an elementary math class to put it together.

~Narendra V Joshi

A Teacher I Never Knew

 
It has been a year since the virus first struck;
Grasping its victims within its viscous muck.
Hope now has rekindled, yet the journey is hard;
For the pandemic has left us permanently scarred.
 
Glimmers of light amidst the scars have shown;
The virus is a teacher the world had never known.
Blossoming simplicity and kindness in the people’s hearts.
Bringing families together by fits and starts.
 
It was never for the virus to help humans from falling as a divided kind.
For it was our ego that has clouded our intelligent mind.
Yet as we stand holding onto to an unlikely helping hand;
It’s ours alone to act as per the righteous demand.

 

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The announcement of vaccine raises hope about end of the Covid pandemic. Midst the havoc the Covid virus has brought, I think the lockdowns in a way has helped bring out the best in us. The virus has brought out kindness and shown us the path to a simple living. Above all, the virus has helped connect families and communities, and has thought us to share and care for each other. In some sense, the virus turned out to be a teacher I never knew.

 

~Narendra V Joshi

The Experience of Life

I would look up at the heavens to bless me with a life;
Laden with none of exhilaration or strife.
Filled only with stillness and serene and calm;
Resisting even an occasional qualm.

At first I liked that steady calm;

Thanking heavens for bestowing the wishes warm.
Happiness yet was nowhere to be found;
For life felt empty, in spite of calmness abound.

I no more look at the heavens to bless me a choice;

Cause the experience of life does not have a single voice.
Accept and live through every happiness and strife;
Only this can help realize the true meaning of life. 

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I used to wish for a life which is kind of still, with no major ups and down. Then I realized what I was wishing was to be a rock because there is no meaning for a still life. To experience life fully, I have to experience and live through every facet that comes with it and not restrict myself to any one phase alone.

~Narendra V Joshi

Words of encouragement

My kids watched an animation movie of a monster in the closet. After the movie, my elder one looked okay but my 5-year-old seemed a little jittery to go to his room. He came to me asked if I could put his blanket and be with him till he sleeps. He wanted me to tell him a story and put him to sleep.

I followed him to his room. He got into his bed and I helped him pull his blanket. I slept next to him and started patting his forehead to put him to sleep. Every few moments, he would open his eyes look at me and stare at the closet. Finally, he asked if I could close the closet door. I closed the closet door and slept next to him again patting his head. He seemed a little relaxed after I had closed the closet door.

I felt I should give him some words of encouragement for him to overcome his fear. 

Me: You know, there are no monsters. It’s all only in the movies. There are no monsters and ghosts in real life.

My son opened his eyes and looked at me. I asked him to close his eyes and sleep continuing to pat his head.

Me: You remember that superhero movie we watched? Have you seen any superhero flying outside? No right? Same way. There are no ghosts or monsters or superheroes. It’s all only in the movies.

My son: Yes, I know

This was encouraging. He opened his eyes again and looked at me.

Me: You are a brave kid. Look at yourself. You are only 5 but you sleep alone. If there is really such thing as a monster, you can fight it all by yourself.

My son: Can I really do that? (Now he was excited)

Me: Sure you can. Who will protect your sister and mama and papa if a monster really comes?

My son: So I can fight like a superhero?

I nodded my head.

My son: But I don’t have a wand nor can I fly.

Me: You are brave and you don’t need a wand nor you need to fly to fight the monster.

His eyes were now wide open and there was a new found courage showing on his face. I felt proud having instilled courage and confidence in my son.

My son: Papa, are you scared to sleep alone?

Me: No I am not. I am the papa of the bravest boy. Why will I be scared?

My son: Then why do you always sleep next to mama?

I went blank.  All my thoughts of courage fell flat. I looked at his face and he was waiting for me to answer but no answer came up in my head.

My son: Or is it, you sleep next to mama because mama is scared?

I was tempted to say “Yes” (actually SHOUT Yes) but stopped myself. I did not want to lie to him. And even if I did lie now, just to answer his question he will figure it out when he asks his mama tomorrow, and she denies. I didn’t want to set a bad example to him that his papa lies.

I was in a dilemma. I was thinking what to answer.

My son: Papa; is mama scared? Is that why she sleeps next to you?

Me: Ah.. Err… (I had no answer. I had to change the topic and FAST)

Me: Sleep now please. It is late. You want to come walking with me tomorrow evening right? You have to sleep now, else you will be all tired and you will not be able to walk.

I was pretty much silent from that point on. No more encouraging thoughts or words popped in my head. I continued patting him until he fell asleep. Knowing him, I am sure he will ask me this same question tomorrow or some other time until he gets an answer.

I had walked into my sons’ room to allay his worries and fill him with confidence. I walked out of his room a worried man.

~Narendra V Joshi

x

A Privilege to cherish and protect

The earth was polluted and the future looked bleak;

The humans yet trotted, with an unwavering streak.

Governments and leaders searched for answers in vain;

To get the earth back on to its righteous lane.

The lock down opened up to an unproven trail;

For nature to seize and chaperon on its rail.

The earth was momentarily rid of its pollutant wrath;

But questions endured of its viable path. 

Viable or not, the lock down demands a retrospect;

For this is our chance to mend and protect.

The Earth is a privilege and not a birthright;

And it’s our duty to respect and nurture it right.

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I read an article which talked about how the lock-downs in major cities across the globe to prevent the spread of COVID-19 virus, is actually helping bring down the pollution levels. This certainly is a good side effect but maybe only temporary; until restrictions are lifted and things get back to normal. I think we should learn from this crisis to mend and develop ways to protect the nature. We need to understand that earth is not our birthright but a privilege granted to us. 


~Narendra V Joshi

Parenting under surveillance

I was teaching math addition to my 4 year old the other day. I gave him 2 cookies and asked –

Me – "I had given you 1 cookie yesterday and I gave you 2 cookies today. How many cookies do you have?"

My son – 2 cookies.

Then I tried the same using pencils. I gave him 1 pencil and then gave 2 more. He counted 3. I tried it with crayons and he counted 3. Then I got back to my question on cookies.

Me – I gave you 1 cookie yesterday and 2 today. How many do you have?

My son – 2 cookies.

I put up 3 fingers saying each finger is a cookie and asked him to count. He counted 3 and said “But I have only 2 cookies papa”. I asked him how. He said – “I already eat the cookie you gave me yesterday”. He paused for a few mins and added “remember you said think”.

I was trying to teach him math and he thought me logic.

I was speechless but have now learnt to expect such answers from my kids. They sometimes amaze me into thinking how do they even come up with some of the answers they give or some of the questions they ask.

I had to drop my daughter for a class this morning and my son too accompanied us in the car. While coming back home, my son sat in the rear car seat diagonally opposite to me. He had got his steering wheel toy with him which is a steering wheel and a gear shift that makes different sounds when moved. My son was watching me drive and was steering his toy wheel in the same way as I was doing. He said “papa, I want to drive a car like you when I grow up”. I was almost about to tell him that maybe there will be no cars with a steering wheel by the time he grows up, but stopped myself.

It then occurred to me. Maybe my kids are not learning much by listening to me. Maybe my kids are learning more by watching me; Or rather by observing me. As I thought about this I realized they have been giving me subtle hints all these years but I never realized this until now. Every time they said “I want to be like you when I grow up”, “I want to work on computer like papa”, “I want to drive a car like papa”, … this is what they were doing. They have been observing me and learning from me. I am their role model.

The very thought that my kids may be feeding off of my actions and inculcating them makes me shudder. This is like I am under constant observation; a whole new kind of surveillance. A surveillance where my kids are silently watching me, making sense of my actions and absorbing it to tune their life. It brings in a whole new sense of responsibility in me. I need to ensure I am always putting the best of me in front of my kids.

As I think about this more, I feel maybe this is not bad after all. They may be helping me in way. If I go through this surveillance putting out the best of me now, I don’t have to do a surveillance on my kids when they come of age. I can be assured that what my kids will do is what I would have done in the same situation.

~Narendra V Joshi

A constricted mind

My son came back home from his preschool the other day and asked me “Papa, what do you want to be when you grow up?” I was almost about to say something but stopped. I sat back and repeated his question to myself – What do I want to be when I grow up? This was the first time in over 20 years someone had asked me this question. I did not want to just say anything. I really wanted to think and answer his question.

So what do I want to be when I grow up? I remember when I was a kid I wanted to join the navy. I have always liked sitting at the beach and listen to the sound of the waves. As a kid the very thought that if I was in Navy, I can be on a ship sailing on the seas excited me. But can I join the navy when I grow up, I questioned myself. Maybe the navy will have age, height, weight etc restrictions. Maybe Navy may not be a choice for me anymore. Can I become a musician? I like music. I have interest in learning to play musical instruments. But playing musical instruments requires lot of practice. I will be a failure if I choose the path of a musician. Maybe I can be a doctor. I can travel to remote areas and help people. I can be of some use to the people around me. But doctors have to study a lot. I have to get back to school and learn for the next several years before I can become a doctor. This might not be something for me.

I was thinking about what I can become when I grow up for several moments. I thought of every dream I had as I grew and scratched everything off for different reasons. Doctor, chartered accountant, musician, pilot, I had reasons why I cannot grow up to be anyone from any of those dreams.

My son shook me slightly and asked again – “Papa, what do you want to be when you grow up?”

There has to be something I can be when I grow up. I gave a deep thought and finally said “Teacher, I want to be a teacher when I grow up”, which brought a big smile on my sons face. I was happy there was something I can be when I grow up.

My son turned to leave and I asked him what he wanted to be when he grows up. He answered my question almost immediately. He said he wanted to be a doctor when he is as big as his sister, build roller coasters when he is as big as his cousin brother, a firefighter when he is as big as his mother, work on computer when he is as big as me, a dentist when is as big as his grandmother and a superhero with a large cape when is as big as his grandfather.

His answer dumbfounded me. What did just happen? My preschool son has so much clarity and ideas on what he wants to be when he grows up. While all my education and my degrees had only helped me to come up with reasons why I cannot become something when I grow up. Is this what education is supposed to do? The human mind is boundless and of immense possibilities. Education is supposed to be the tool which gives sense and broadens those possibilities. Unfortunately I was using my education to only bind my mind and constrict its possibilities.

I sat back to think. I decided I have to reconsider what I wanted to be when I grow up. But before that, maybe first I should empty my mind and get it back to its original state of immense possibilities. Then I should think what I want to be when I grow up. 

~Narendra V Joshi

Searching for peace at the top of the pyramid

We had been to a zoo the other day. We had reached there early as the zoo is big and takes a full day for family with kids to go around completely. The place was crowed but the kids were excited looking at the animals as we went around the zoo. It was close to the feeding time for the apes by the time we reached the part which has enclosures for chimps, gorillas, monkeys etc. There are benches to sit and watch as the animals are fed by the zoo keepers. I sat down to watch on one of the bench. It was like a few minutes when the gentleman next to me started a conversation. We spoke about how the animals behave when they see the food, how they eat, how the keepers handle them. One part of our conversation went like this -

Gentleman – It seems as if these animals know the time when to expect the food. Look at how they react when they see the keepers. You see those chimps there? Looks like they are now full.

Me – Some of them already seem to be sleeping.

Gentleman – yeah. It’s nice to see all these animals at the zoo; especially once they are fed. Once they are full they relax and laze. It feels so calm and peaceful to see them.

Me – True. It feels so peaceful here.

We spoke for some time but this part of the conversation did not leave me. I kept thinking about it even long after we had left that area. Something was bothering me. The question then occurred to me - “What is wrong with me?”.

We humans are supposed to be the most intelligent species on earth and represent the pinnacle of evolution. But when it comes to be being peaceful, none of this intelligence helps and we have to look at a bunch of monkeys to relax and be at peace? Maybe these monkeys know something that we intelligent humans don’t. Agreed, these animals are in cages and unfortunately have to spend a restricted life. But they get food on time without any effort and they seem to be at peace with this arrangement. And more so what is it that we humans are achieving been outside the cage? We worry about something or the other all the time - taxes, mortgages, children’s education, traffic, you name it. We also worry about things that have not even happened – stock market predictions, retirement money, health insurance for illness we don’t have.

The fundamental truth of our worries is that none of our worries are about alien invasion from outer space or a comet on a collision path with earth or such things as they show in movies. All of our worries have everything to do with the thoughts and actions of other humans. So all through our lives we worry about things that are based on actions and reactions of fellow humans.

Looks like somewhere during our evolution from apes, we exchanged peace for intelligence. Then we used our intelligence to cage monkeys and donkeys and feed them so that they don’t have to worry about food. Now we are using the same intelligence to achieve calm and peace by looking at those monkeys and donkeys as they laze around on full stomach.

I am still wondering; who is more intelligent - The ones inside the cage or the ones outside? 

~Narendra V Joshi

The inevitable changes in the journey of life

I was on this flight to back home the other day, deeply engrossed in the in-flight entertainment TV show when my co-passenger tapped on my TV screen. I pushed back my headphone to look at him and he pointed me to the flight attendant. The flight attendant was trying to get my attention to check if I wanted food. I took the food, politely apologized to both the attendant and the co-passenger, stopped the TV and settled down to eat. “You like that show?” my co-passenger asked me with a slight questionable smile. I nodded my head but did not understand why he was smiling. “Your kids traveling with you?” he asked again, and I said no. We did not speak after that but I was surprised how he knew I had kids. It then occurred to me. The moment the in-flight entertainment had started, I had gone to the kids section, searched for a cartoon and had settled down for a princess cartoon which my daughter watches. The funny part was that my kids were not even with me on that flight J. 

I got down at the airport, and my connecting flight was after an hour. I sat in the waiting area still thinking about that incident on the flight. I think every event in life brings about a change in us, however subtle. We change after high school, after college, after marriage, after kids, when we start a job; and it goes on. Probably the biggest change is after marriage and after kids. When you have kids you know what your kids want and adjust your life to suit the kids. Your vacation list now has only kid approved places and the vacation days are only around the kids’ school holidays. You no more go to a movie or watch a TV show which is not appropriate for the kids. Maybe that co-passenger had kids and that is how he knew I had kids.

Outside of these big changes I think we also go through temporary transformations every day as we step into work. In my case I think I become a little more patient, little more attentive, little more careful, the moment I step into office. It’s not just the different work wear, the funny part is even our language changes. We are no more just at work or in meetings. We are now in “stand up” meetings, preparing “decks”, working for weekend ‘deliverables” and focusing on “production installs” J 

I glanced at my watch and still had over 30 mins for my next flight. I walked to a coffee shop to get coffee. I took the coffee and went to get sugar and cream. I was at the sugar and cream table when another gentlemen came and stood next to me. He too had coffee in his hand and had come to get sugar and cream. I usually take about 5 to 6 sachets of sugar for 12oz of coffee. I would take sachet after sachet never thinking twice while I was in college, but getting into work has changed it all. I had to put through surprise stairs and questions from people in office for consuming so much sugar. I am now a little more discreet while adding those extra sugar sachets trying not to attract too much attention. So I took 2 sachets and stirred my coffee waiting for the gentleman to leave. The guy too took 2 sachets and kept stirring his coffee. It was more than like a few seconds but the guy did not move. After probably a minute of stirring the coffee I gave up and decided to go for 4 more sachets and ignore if the guy comments. To my utter surprise, the guy too took 4-5 more sachets of sugar and looked at me. We both realized we were waiting for each other to move, to add more sugar. We greeted each other and he told me how he too gets strange looks from people when he adds those extra sachets of sugar. We bid goodbye to each other and I walked back to my flight gate with an added sense of assurance. 

So it’s not just me. Everyone who goes through the regular life events also goes through some inevitable changes. One change might be to accommodate something new while another change might be to accommodate something different. Bottom line, I think it’s these changes that defines where we stand in this journey of life.

~Narendra V Joshi

The Ghost Alarm

The arrival of spring signals the arrival of pollen. To me, it means allergies. I am allergic to tree pollen and avoid going out during pollen heavy days. This past weekend was nice and sunny, and we thought of taking the kids out to play in the park.  However with the air heavy on pollen I had to stay back while my wife and kids went out. With the kids out I sat down to watch a science fiction horror movie. Over the course of the weekend, I ended up watching 3 horror movies, 2 of which were recommendation based on my previous watch item.

My allergies were acting up by the time I reached home from office yesterday (Monday). I took an allergy medication before going to bed, which as a side effect causes marked drowsiness. The medication helped me breathe easy and I was asleep soon.

I was woken by the sound of an alarm this morning. The sound was not defying to get me out of the bed, but was enough to wake me up. I looked around and it was still dark. There was heaviness in my head due to the allergy medication but that did not bother me as much as the alarm did. The alarm bothered me because there is no clock in our home which makes that particular sound. So where was this sound coming from? I looked around in the dark but could not make out anything. The alarm suddenly stopped sounding. I thought maybe it from our neighbors’ house and went back to sleep. I was woken up again with that same alarm sound and this time too it was still dark and no sign of where that sound was coming from. I thought I was dreaming and rubbed my eyes but I could feel my hands and face. So I was definitely not dreaming. The alarm sound stopped again and I quickly pulled the blanket over my head and tried to sleep. It was complete silence but I could not sleep this time. That alarm sound however faint it was, felt sinister.

I was trying to put my thoughts to rest when that alarm started again. I sat up on the bed and looked around. It was dark and nothing was moving. There was suddenly a sound of someone running which came from the living room, but I recognized that sound. It is from the dog which stays in the house above us. But what if that sound was not of that dog but actually came from within our house? I thought of getting out of the bed when the alarm stopped again. I wondered what to do next when I noticed a faint white light at the other end of the room. Just like that alarm, the light went on and off maybe 2-3 times. Was this some kind of a game? What was happening? At some point both the alarm and the light stopped; and the whole room was quiet and dark again. I quickly went back to bed and pulled the blanket over my head. All this was new and had never happened to me. In a moment every scary scene from each of those horror movies played through my mind.  Was my blanket getting pulled? Am I hanging in the air as they show in the movies? Was that a ghost standing at the corner? I tried to tell myself I don’t believe in ghosts and all this was just a bad dream. I had started to calm my mind when I suddenly heard a sound and felt like someone was standing right next to me and I could feel his breathing. It sent shivers down my spine. I lay still on the bed with the blanket over my head. The scariest scenes from the horror movie were now replaying in my head.

This is not me; I told myself. I don’t believe in ghosts and a horror movie cannot scare me. I pulled the blanket off and stared in the dark. There was no one next to me. I could almost hear my heart beating. I am better than this; I told myself. I got off the bed. The air from the AC duct hit my head; a sign of relief. Suddenly I saw the same white light at the corner. I went to check and it was my cell phone. I had put my cell phone on silent mode and face down when I slept and it glowed every time there was a message. I put the phone face down again and went into the living room. There was no one there. I switched on the light and looked at the front door and the porch door. Everything seemed fine. I was about to switch off the light when that alarm sounded again. It was loud and seemed to come from the play room. My kids use the play room to play but sleep in their own room. So no one should be in the play room yet there was a sound. The door of the playroom was closed. I slowly opened the playroom door and switched on the light. There were toys scattered but no one in the room. The alarm sounded louder and closer now. I looked in the direction of the alarm and there was a bag.

It suddenly occurred to me what might be making that sound. My wife had brought a watch as a gift for someone; maybe it was that watch alarm sounding off. I tore the wrapping paper and pulled that watch out. The watch had different alarm modes and it was indeed set to go off at 2:48 AM on Tuesday, with a 10 sec snooze mode. So this was the problem. Today being Tuesday the alarm went off at 2:48 AM and it snoozed every 10 seconds. I fiddled with the watch for some time but was unable to switch off the alarm. The only option left was to go through the user manual. I patiently went through the user manual and finally at around 3 AM this morning I was able to switch off the watch alarm putting an end to that ghostly sound.

~Narendra V Joshi

The humbling experience

I recently attended a meeting of a small group of technology and domain experts. The meeting was to focus on a problem statement and dissect it under different technology and domain lenses. Each person was from a different field and bought a unique expertise to the table. It was evident they had spent years in their focus area assimilating and growing their knowledge. Very quickly I had realized ‘expert’ was too modest a noun to describe them. The meeting which had started as an amazing experience had soon turned into a humbling experience for me.

I have been thinking about that experience for the last few days and seem to have found a correlation between that meeting and Expert systems/Artificial intelligence-Machine learning (AL-ML) system. That meeting to me resembled an expert system building pattern where experts pour their knowledge and experience to solve a complex problem.

As I thought more, my mind started drawing random parallels between that meeting and expert systems and generally wandered into the direction of the expert systems. Every expert system (or an AI-ML system) when introduced, first sparks a sense of bewilderment. It is approached with a set of presumptions and questions, bordering disdain. As the expert system proves and grows with promise, the disdain soon turns into an admiration for the expert system. The user starts appreciating the system and its potential. Often the admiration might even give way to distrust. A distrust might arise from a question of job security or individual well being or even from a question of ultimate survival. Take the example of Self-driving cars; they were initially struck down as a work of fiction. But as the self-driving promise held ground, it turned into an admiration. Distrust too found way in the hearts of the car enthusiasts who hated the very thought of sitting in the back seat and not at the wheel.  Isn’t it a similar pattern for most AI-ML systems, maybe with only slight variations? But one stand out feature among all these systems is the sense of humbleness that they evolve. Once you accept and understand the power of expert systems, they undeniably lead to a sense of humbleness. The user is humbled at the sheer talent of these systems.

As my mind searched for parallels, some things started falling out - the non-parallels. The non-parallels in terms of human emotions, or spontaneous thoughts, or even simple non-verbal expressions. Are there parallels to these? Even two humans can rarely experience the same levels of emotion. Any level of admiration, distrust or even humbleness that the AI-ML systems evoke, cannot replace these simple non-parallels. It is these subtle non-parallels that defines us as humans, and separates us humans from the AI-ML systems.  Maybe at some point in the future when the AI-ML systems have significantly evolved, they too might hit a point of humbleness. The humbleness that might arise in them from the fact that non-parallels exit between them and the humans.

~Narendra V Joshi

The White Blanket

We had record snow of almost 8 to 10 inches in our city this week. It snowed nearly the entire day covering the streets, lawns and trees like a thick white carpet. It was a beautiful sight, to see everything white and glowing. But that sight was short lived. The walk ways were quickly cleared and people thronged the lawns to play in the snow. The beautiful snow carpet was trampled and almost destroyed. The temperature increased today and all snow melted. I am now waiting for the next snow.

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The lawns and streets looked carpeted white;

With snow stuffed trees on the sides glowing bright.

The snow had covered every inch of the land;

Eclipsing the earth at the stroke of its wand.

The men soon arrived with shovels and salt;

To clear the snow and bring its spread to a halt.

Children and families swooped to capture the enthralling sight;

Trampling the snow which was laid picture perfect right.

The earth showed again as the day grew old;

Bursting with colors as the snow started to unfold.

Despite all colors the earth missed its glow.

Waiting to be painted with a fresh coat of snow.

~Narendra V Joshi

The price of 1 smiley

We love to shop at a particular warehouse chain of which I am a member for several years now. If we need something and it is available at that place, we buy it; no cross shopping, no price comparisons and no second thoughts. I love this warehouse to a point where if I have nothing to do, the first thought that comes to my mind is to take a stroll at this place. My wife and daughter are not so much of a fan, but my 3 year old son seems to like going to this warehouse. The attraction for him seems to be the smileys that the associates draw for him on the sales receipt. He almost snatches the receipt from us and rushes to the store exit to get a smiley on it.

I was looking for something a few days back and had called the warehouse location I frequent, to check if they had it in stock. I was told, that location had ran out of stock and was directed to a different location. My wife and daughter stayed back, and only my son and I went to the other location. I found what I was looking for and bought it. My son promptly took the sales receipt from me and handed it over to the associate at the exit. The associate checked the items and gave back the receipt without drawing a smiley. My son took that receipt and turned it over looking for the smiley. He handed the receipt back to the associate, but the associate gave it back saying it was reviewed. My son started crying that there is no smiley on the receipt. There were not many people in the line behind me and so I requested the associate to put a smiley on that receipt for my son. The associate shook his head and said he was busy.

I remember my daughter used to look for smileys on the receipt when she was little. We have been to several locations of this warehouse across the country and in a rare instance when the associate forgets to draw a smiley, they would always put it once the kid requests for it. It only takes a few seconds to draw a smiley. I have seen associates draw a smiley every time a kid hands them the receipt, however long the exit line is. This is the first time I have seen an associate return the receipt to a kid without putting the smiley even after been requested. I tried to console my son as we walked back to the car but he did not stop crying. Once I put him into the car seat I drew a smiley on the receipt and give it to him. He stopped crying only after seeing that smiley.

I had forgotten about that incident until this last weekend when I told my family that we will drive to this warehouse. My son heard me and said he did not want to come as there is no smiley. I was surprised and ignored at first, but he did not budge. He was clear he will not come and we finally decided not to go.

I have a membership at a large online retailer. I also have membership with 2 different traditional warehouse chains. In addition, I have a membership with a traditional bookstore. I prefer a brick and mortar store over an online retailer, unless I am in a hurry, or there is an extremely good deal online. I have an e-book reader but I prefer buying books at the traditional book store, unless I specifically need an e-book. My reason for this preference is that, the way the online retailers are growing, my kids might not have anything called a mall or a brick and mortar store by the time they grow up. I have nothing against the online retailers, but I am ok spending a few $ more at a brick and mortar shop just to continue seeing them around.  

I did a little thinking about the smiley incident and my shopping preference. A traditional store can provide a personal experience to the shoppers which is not possible in online shopping. This I think is the single biggest advantage they have to attract kids, the next generation shoppers, and addict them with shopping at a traditional store. Hooking the next generation to a brick and mortar store is the only way traditional stores can ensure survival. And, scribbling a smiley on the sales receipt for a kid is a great easy way to attract future shoppers.

Since we did not go to the warehouse last week, I bought the items at the online retailer and they were delivered in 2 days. I actually saved money and time doing so. If it continues like this, I think I may cancel my membership at all these traditional stores and shift to a complete online shopping.  I know I will save money doing so; but these brick and mortar stores will lose 1 current customer and a potential future customer. And all this for 1 smiley, or lack of it. Wonder what is the price of 1 smiley?

 

~Narendra V Joshi